Saturday, June 13, 2009

Business and the Box

The vocabulary of business is laced with cliches. Here are a few, broken down by occupation:

CEO: "Think outside the box."

Entrepreneur: "Born outside the box."

Bureaucrat: "Shut up and get into the box."

Diversity Consultant: "Isn't it wonderful that we have so many different kinds of people in our box?"

Legal Department: "It's safer in the box."

Chief Financial Officer: "This box doesn't balance."

Logistics Department: "Has anyone seen our box?"

Competitor Analysis: "Check out that other box."

Leadership Consultant: "Come on, let's all get in the box!"

Negotiation Consultant: "My box is better than yours."

Chamber of Commerce: "All our boxes are beautiful."

Human Resources: "What are you doing in the box?"

IT: "We're gonna need a bigger box."

Business Ethics Consultant: "We all should decide on what to do with the box."

Environmentalist: "Boxes are murder."

Gay Activist: "Come out of the closet and into the box!"

Angry Feminist: "Smash the ceiling in the box!"

Marxist: "Smash the box!"

Union: "Screw the box."

Economic Development Consultant: "We need more jobs in the box."

Politician: "How many votes are in the box?"

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

Employee Activity Dir: "Meet in the box"
Lobbyist: "Don't ruin the box"
Communications Dir: " All box communication must
centrally controlled"
Gov. Czar: "I say what goes in the box"
Marketing Consultant: You need to find out what your
box craves"
Gov. Regulator: "Your box is not conforming to
government regulations"
Keynesian Economist: "We need to subsidize people to
to stay in the box"
Investor Relations:"Keep your assets in our box"
Austrian Economist: "Your are living in a box built of
cardboard"
Libertarian: "If you try to put me in your box I will resist"